And now for some deep thoughts

It's over.

I feel so empty when anything as big and as time-consuming as this is over. What will give meaning to my life now?

It's really over. Like, law school, and the whole thing.

(Uh, if you passed, hk.)

It's entirely possible that I did not pass either bar.

I woke up today with the stomach ache from hell. It turns out that eating crap for three days, living in a constant state of extreme stress over six weeks, and not sleeping more than 5 hours a night for four days is bad for you! And does bad shit to your body! Who knew?

The human hand is not meant to write continuously for three hours at a time. And then for another three hours after that. And then a day later, for another six hours. Hi, Carpel! Have you met Tunnel? Oh, Syndrome, nice to see you too!

I have never made up so much shit so openly on any test, EVER. On one question, I literally made up rules of law for each issue.

Huh. Don't know how to serve process on an individual who lives in another country. Thus, don't know if she served properly. Don't even fucking know if that's the issue. Well, let's just make up some shit -- here: "Under Crimson State law, an individual living overseas must be served personally. Therefore, the plaintiff did not serve properly and the complaint should be dismissed." NEXT!

I did this with all the issues on that essay, and at least once in every other essay as well. It was sad. It was also kind of funny. Whatever.

The bar exam is useless and does not test whether you will be a good attorney. Just another fucking hoop to jump through.

Why do I feel so empty, when this whole process was so excruciating and only served to drive home more deeply the point that I? Hate. The. Law.

Learning all this actual law is a good thing for a new lawyer to do. If only they did that in law school. What a concept, eh, Crimson?

My god. I'm done. It feels so unreal. Surreal. Definitely not sinking in yet. I feel like I'm going to wake up at 6:15 again tomorrow and sit up in a panic thinking, "I have an hour to get on a bus/car and get to the exam site!"

Damn. Everyone who wrote emails, texted me, or left me messages -- you are wonderful and I am so grateful for your support and encouragement. I love you and want to make love to you all, Roberto Begnini-style!

I'm done.

What's next?