Aaaaand... sick again

Been out of commission since Tuesday noon, nursing an irritated stomach. Went to the doctor today, only to be convinced once again that no one knows much when it comes to the human body and its quirks.

Yesterday, as I am wont to do, imagined that I was suffering from dengue fever or malaria or Hep B. But I really don't think so.

Tomorrow I have my midterm, for which I've only been memorizing vocabulary (at a rate of about 25-40 new words a lesson, you would too), at the expense of grammar. Every day I go through a predictable cycle of:
- confusion (as I am confronted with a new word in class that I haven't seen in my prep for that day);
- frustration (as the Chinese and Japanese students look at the word and say, "Ohhh, that word!" and nod their heads in comprehension);
- despair (as I look through my dictionary only to find four different meanings for the word, each of which gives the given sentence a different spin);
- anger (as I blame the teacher for introducing words in class that we haven't had a chance to prepare for);
- depression (as I think, "I'll never, ever be as good as the other students");
- disgust (as I tell myself I'm an irritating, whiny prat); and
- determination (as I mentally shake myself and tell myself to step up to the challenge, dammit).

I've got a bit of a fatalistic attitude about the test and this term in general.